Masquerade
by Dragongirl4741
Summary: The teams must go undercover to find some of Micheals followers. Ronon/Keller. Rating may change. Please R&R. Changed rating to T just in case but I don't think there is anything overly inapproprate.
1. Chapter 1

Masquerade

"I can't believe this is happening." Jennifer thought to herself again. There was something about the whole thing that just felt wrong in most parts of Earth. Things like this were unheard of, it just didn't happen anymore. Well, she knew that there was really were some places where the basic thought was the same but not to this extent, and yet here she stood with Teyla getting the finishing touches of their disguises, their 'outfits' finished. Outfits, yeah, that's a laugh. She looked again over to the mirror, stared at her reflection, and sighed. Yup, just as she feared she still reminded herself of a bad Princess Lea look a like. At least her hair wasn't done up in those weird buns over her ears; instead her hair was done simply in braids that started at her temples and met in the middle of the back of her head and then joined to make a thinner braid. She just had to keep reminding herself that she would be wearing a bikini, yes that made it easier, a med blue bikini with just the faintest hint of what she supposed was vines in a lighter blue. The wrap around, which she was happy to have, for what little it did for modesty, was a very delicate, gossamer like fabric, which was completely see through, in a pale blue that shimmered like oil on water. This was wrapped around her waist like a sarong and the excess draped over her right shoulder.

Teyla wore a similar outfit in a deep crimson red with a flower design in a brighter ruby red. Her cover was a shimmering silver that only brought out the darker woman's beauty. It had only been a few months since she gave birth to her precious little baby boy, the first child born on Atlantis since the expedition had first arrived. In these last few months, Teyla had quickly lost the baby weight and if you hadn't known about her son you would never have been able to guess that she had ever been pregnant. Jennifer envied the woman next to her. Teyla was such a natural beauty; while she felt not unattractive, but in

comparison to Teyla Jen felt plain.

There was a knock on the door and when given permission to enter, John and Ronon walked in. They too had on disguises but theirs were much less drastic than what Teyla and she had to go through. Both were dressed in a woven cloth in earthy browns. Ronon's was a darker brown than John's was; however, both shirts had plunging v-necks and tan vest. The pants they wore were loose fitting. They reminded Jennifer of a pair she had once seen Ronon come in wearing after one of his sparing accidents.

"Great," Jennifer thought warily, "just what I always wanted while feeling immeasurably uncomfortable, an audience."

John looked over both women appraisingly with a mischievous spark in his eye before giving a low whistle. Teyla responded by giving him one of her looks while Jennifer just turned her head away and toward Ronon.Ronon remained silent. He looked at Teyla, assessing her appearance, then turned his head to Jennifer and gave her a similar once over. The difference is he didn't look away form her; instead he kept his eyes trained on her as if she might vanish at any moment. His face, as usual was unreadable, the only difference in his face was in his eyes, which were narrowed.

Jennifer looked down at her feet believing that the look in Ronon's face was a distaste; that he was wanting right now to be teamed up with Teyla or anyone other than her for this particular mission. That thought made her gut wrench and she was not in the mood to try to reason out the reason why.

"Well ladies," John began, "I hope you two are about ready to go. Now let's go over the basics again, Teyla and I will go into the town from the west, while Ronon and Jennifer, you two will go around and come in from the north. Remember, we are going in pretending to be travelers, while in town we must try and gather information on the Intel we received telling us that some of Michael's mercenary friends that have supposedly been seen around. We will probably have to stay at least one night; if however, it looks as if we may need to spend more time than that we will have our radios with us. The people on this planet shouldn't be able to detect radio signals. If anyone asks, we are just traveling; if we should run into each other out in public, we will not give any indication of knowing each other. These people are untrustworthy and we don't want them to think that a number of strangers have invaded there town."

"Wouldn't this be easier if we didn't pretend anything? Why can't we just go into the town and talk to these people?" Jennifer wondered aloud, hoping that she would not be part of this elaborate plain. "I mean why sneak around? Things will be worse for us if they find out that we have lied to them." She asked not only for the reasons she told them but also because she was scared that she would do or say something that would give them away and she didn't want to be the reason there was trouble if they were to be found out.

"This planet is unlike any other planet in the galaxy we have encountered; the rules here are very different. If they knew that where we are really from the men see women as equal to them and even in positions of power they would give us nothing, they would throw us out of the town very quickly and we would be in the same position we find ourselves in right now."

"Okay then why not just have men go and ask around? I don't like the idea of having to be little more than a pet, a slave, and if anyone picks up on that…"

Ronon interrupted her and spoke for the first time since entering. "Every man on the planet has at least one woman that belongs to him. John and I would stick out and raise too much suspension. We have to have the two of you with us or this will never work."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

It didn't come up in chapter one though it should have I don't own anyone or Ronon yet;)

And thanks to my beta for the title of this story I didn't have a name for it and she suggested it.

Chapter 2 (Ronon's POV)

Ronon was not overly thrilled with this mission; actually, it had nothing to do with the actual mission, if he was totally honest with himself and anyone that asked him he wasn't thrilled that Jennifer was going. He had this strong desire to see that she was safe. She couldn't protect herself like Teyla. It wasn't that she was weak; he had seen she could be strong when she really needed to be but when it came to a fight, well he would do everything he could to keep her safe. He knew he would do the same for just about anyone on Atlantis but this was different.

As John and he walked to get Teyla and Jennifer, Ronon noticed John picking at his shirt. He thought John might be wondering if his concealed weapons were fully concealed. Of course they were! Ronon had told him and showed him where to put every one of them so no one would even suspect. Then again, it might have nothing to do with the hidden weapons and more to do with Teyla. This would, after all, be the first time they would be alone together since she got back to Atlantis. John swore they were nothing more than friends, but Ronon still thought that that John felt more than just friendship. It was on his mind to ask John about it when they found themselves at the destination, and John knocked.

When he entered the room, he looked at Teyla to see what the outfit looked like, and then to Jennifer to see how see looked in hers. He felt his breath catch for a moment or two. He thought she looked gorgeous. The blue of her outfit was perfect to show her hazel eyes, and her pale skin looked so smooth and flawless. He meet her eyes and again he found himself wishing that someone else were going, but then again he would be stuck with someone else. That idea he liked even less, at least she would be with him. That way he could be sure that she would be safe.John was yet again going over the plan. Ronon just tuned out most of it as he had heard it all before, but then Jennifer spoke up. She didn't really want to go and he began to fear that she would ask either that she not go or John would decide that they could use someone else. So he did what he thought would help get her to come along.

"Every man on the planet has at least one woman that belongs to him. John and I would stick out and raise too much suspicion. We have to have the two of you with us or this will never work."He kept his eyes locked on hers and he could see the emotions running around in her mind. He hoped that what he said got through to her and she would come along with them.

She let out a sigh and nodded before saying, "Okay, I understand and it is only for one day, so I can make this work without screwing everything up."

"Right, well, let's get this show going." John said as he clasped his hands together and looked at the previously packed bags for the ones that went with Ronon and Jennifer, and the one he and Teyla would be taking for their mission. Once he had them, he handed one to Ronon, who was wondering about Jennifer's "only one night" comment.

Rodney was there at the gate room waiting for the rest of his team, and started doing what he is best at, complaining. "I really think that I should be going with you on this one. What if there is any technical information that goes over all of your heads? I need to be there."

"Rodney, cool it! Everything will be fine. I doubt we are going to find out anything that we will have a hard time remembering." John said.

"Besides McKay, most of the women here on Atlantis are too much for you, no one would believe that any woman would be obedient to you." Ronon replied.

"Well I wouldn't say that," Rodney commented back.

"Oh you're right; every woman here on Atlantis is too much for you." Ronon said quickly. Sometimes it was too easy to pick on Rodney.

The gate activated then and even with the whooshing sound of the gate could not cover up Rodney's mumblings. Ronon was sure he heard the words "rude" and "caveman". Ronon smirked a bit and continued to the gate. He stepped through the gate with the other three members of this little undercover mission.

TBC

Sorry I know it is short.


	3. Chapter 3

Here is the new chapter I am not really sure about this one. Anyway thanks for all the reviews and my Beta.

Chapter 3

While Jennifer listened to Ronon telling her why she needed to go on the mission, his green eyes had locked with hers and she didn't think she could look away if she tried. She became aware of her voice agreeing to go before she knew it, and about the same time, she realized that she would probably have agreed to almost anything he asked her to do at that moment and forget about her own comfort.

John clapping his hands together brought her back to Atlantis and the mission she was only moments away from going on. She mentally shook herself while Ronon's back was turned to her and John was other wise engaged in determining which pack belong to which mini team. Teyla and her bent over and slipped their feet into the sandals that would complete this humiliation. She had waited till the guys were no longer looking in her direction because she felt exposed enough while standing up right and being in a crouched position was more vulnerable.

The walk to the gate room was quite and uneventful. It wasn't till they got there that anyone even said anything to them. She wasn't surprised that it was Rodney that would be voicing complaints. She smiled to herself as she thought that even if he were going he would be complaining. That was one thing that you could always count on; no matter the situation, Rodney would find something to complain about.

She thought it odd that if it was anyone else it might be annoying and at times it was but really, the way he did it was at time humorous.

Jennifer had to bite back a laugh at Rodney when Ronon was telling him that he couldn't handle any of the women on Atlantis. Leave it to Ronon to be that blunt. Jennifer was looking at Ronon out of the corner of her eye to see if he could hear what Rodney was saying about him and the smirk she saw on his mouth told her that he could. She wondered if she would be stitching up Rodney when they got back from this mission.

Once they all stepped through the gate, Jennifer looked around at her surroundings. There were trees and rocks, big and small, and more trees. She wondered why she looked at all. Most every planet looked the same; very few people built towns near the gate. She knew they had a fair distance to walk because John had lead a mission in a cloaked puddle jumper earlier.

"It will take Teyla and I only about 20 minutes or so on foot, but because we are coming in from different directions, Ronon, you and Dr. Keller will have to walk about 45 minutes so let's get moving."

"Sure, they get the short walk," she thought as they began the walk through the woods.

They had only walked about 10 minutes or so before stopping for a moment.

"Well, it looks like this is where we say good bye guys. Remember just a day, 24 hours, and then head back to the gate."

"John, if you go over these details again I promise you will regret it during our next sparing session."

"Right, well, I am sure you know what you are doing, so Teyla and I are heading out this way. Jennifer, Ronon, good luck, and Ronon stay out of trouble please. Last thing we need is to have to get you out of a jam. Jennifer, if you can remind him to be good." John said with a wave and headed off.

Teyla gave Jennifer an encouraging nod before turning and heading off with John. Then just like that, she was alone with Ronon. Looking over at him, she saw him shaking his head slightly before he looked over at her.

"He is usually the one that gets into trouble not me. Don't worry, everything will be fine."

--

(Ronon POV)

Ronon was trying to take the easiest path possible for Jennifer, the clothes that she was wearing weren't exactly made for any mission, nor having to take long walks through the woods. He was also aware that she wasn't used to this kind of thing, she felt more comfortable in the infirmary and saving lives than trekking through wilderness. That was why after about another 20 minutes after splitting from John and Teyla, it was time for a break.

"Is there something wrong? Why are we stopping?"

"There is nothing wrong. I just thought what with your clothes it might be time for a short rest before we finish." Ronon responded, handing Jennifer a bottle of water.

"Oh, okay, yeah thanks for that." Jennifer said, taking the water with a look of relief on her face.

Jennifer took a drink and handed the bottle back before walking over to a rock that was near by. Ronon took the time to study her more closely.

Her hair shined in the rays of sunlight that managed to get through the trees canopy. He noticed though that her steps seemed hesitant and unsure where normally her movements were more fluid, but he figured that it was the outfit. He had noticed that women from Earth hardly ever wore anything that showed as much skin as this was. When she turned, her eyes caught him. They looked like the honey that was served in the commissary, but he was sure that her eyes were hazel earlier.

"What is something wrong?" Jennifer wondered looking to down to see if she had torn part of her outfit or something.

"No, it is just, I thought…well your eyes are brown I thought they were hazel."

"Oh, no, they change depending on lighting and mood. It isn't very common. You know I don't think anyone here has noticed. You are very observant aren't you?" she told him as she lowered her head to hide the flush he could already see creeping up her face.

"It helps to be when you are a runner." he told her. She looked up briefly at that but then seemed to find something interesting to look at down by her feet and stayed that way till they continued the walk to the town.

The walk was easy for him and he allowed his mind to think back over the last few years. After the wraith made him a runner he had only the time to think about staying one-step ahead of the wraith, and hunting the wraith, and where he was going next. Then he had captured Teyla and John, and his life changed.

They had given him hope that he could stop running and go home, and he took it. When he had seen the destruction of Sateda, he had believed he was the last, the only one to remember his people.

When John had asked him to stay to fight with the others from Atlantis, he thought that it could be a way to lead a more normal life and fight the wraith, and so he had stayed. That was when, for the first time in seven years, he truly grieved for Melena and the rest of his people. When John had asked him about dating, he told the truth. Even after a year and a half, he just wasn't ready.

After the incident with Ara, Rakai and Tyre, he started to think that Atlantis really was home and maybe it was time to move on, live his life and not dwell on the past. Since the quarantine, he had found his mind wandering to Jennifer more and more.

The last leg of the journey was an easy one and they reached the town faster than either of them had realized. They stopped and looked at the town knowing that the easiest part of the mission was over now came the acting and lying.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

(Jennifer POV)

As they made their way into town, Jennifer walked one-step behind and just to the right of Ronon, who was good enough to slow his usually long step so that she didn't have to jog to keep up. Jennifer kept her eye trained on Ronon's back; all of these were of course customary on this planet for the women. Here where woman were subservient they walked behind the men who "owned" them, and they watched the men's backs so that their eyes wouldn't roam. They were also not allowed to speak unless their men gave them permission. Men ate and drank first then the woman was allowed. There were many other rules that had to be drilled into not only Teyla and Jennifer, but also John and Ronon so that all four would know how to behave and they would have no surprises. As much as they all disliked these customs, they were grateful that one of the allies Atlantis had made told them all about them.

Jennifer found it difficult not to look at all the sights that surrounded her. When she first heard all of the things she would have to do and not do she was shocked and then furious at the men on this planet, and the women for not standing up for themselves. Just the idea was infuriating that the men here didn't think that a woman could be productive members in society. If people of Earth had a similar view of woman she would not be a Doctor, and she would never have been asked to travel to another galaxy. Instead, she would probably be "owned" by some guy who would never leave Chippewa Falls, not that there was anything wrong with that. Just think of everything she had been able to see because she had that freedom. These thoughts still made her mad but she was very careful not to let it show, she hoped, or else they could be in trouble.

The first stop was at a nearby Inn so Ronon could arrange for a room for them for the night. Jennifer thought only briefly that the sleeping arrangements had never really been discussed. It was obvious that they would have to share a room but other than that, nothing was said. As Ronon began to head away from the desk, she made sure to continue to follow the required distance behind.

"Well, looks like this is it." Ronon said upon entering the room, looking around as he sat the pack down by the door.

Jennifer took in the room, not really small but not exactly big either. The furniture was sparse. There was a lumpy looking plush chair, a small table and the bed, which would be about the size of a queen back on Earth. It would only be right if the men wanted to find another way to show control over the women; 'Look at the bed I get to sleep on and I might be nice and let you share with me but you will have to do everything I tell you ha'. That was if they even let the woman sleep on the bed and not the floor. Okay, so the anger was still there Jennifer mused to herself.

"So, what is the plan on what we do the rest of the day? Where are we going to go to get info first?" Jennifer asked, anxious to get this mission going so that it would end sooner and she could get back into normal cloths.

"Well, I thought that we would go for a walk through the shops and see what we can find, and then later we will go to a tavern or two and see what we can learn." Ronon said.

"All right, I'll follow your lead." she joked, "I mean it isn't like I have much choice."

--

They walked through the market and shops, Jennifer kept her ears open to see if she could hear anything plus she wanted to remember what Ronon heard for the debriefing they would go through after the mission was completed. Ronon made a few stops at a number of places and talked to the vendors. She did notice that he had a tendency to stop at the shops that sold knives and other weapons more than some other shops. Every place they went too Ronon asked around and got some helpful information and they had a few helpful leads. A few of the people that he talked to had mentioned some shady guys.

After a few hours, Ronon stopped and picked up some food or at least that is what Jennifer hoped, was she was starving, and then headed for the Inn. Jennifer was anxious to ask Ronon what he was planning and what their next move would be but had to remember to bite her tongue before she actually said anything.

Jennifer had not realized, until the trip back to the Inn, how big the town was. Larger than a lot of the towns and villages she had been to before. She was noticing now mainly because she was tired and just wanted a rest. She had done what she said she needed to do in regards to doing more cardio but this was getting to be too much.Once back in their room Jennifer plopped herself into the lumpiest chair she had ever sat in but she wasn't complaining.

"It feels like I have been all my feet for days. I swear I haven't had to be on my feet like this for years," Jennifer said with a smile.

"But you work in the infirmary for longer than we have been walking today." Ronon responded.

"Yes, but between paper work, research and stuff I am not on my feet for my full shift and I get to wear comfortable shoes designed for people who will be standing and walking for long periods of time. These," she said while lifting a leg and pointing down at her sandal clad foot, "are just leather with straps."

"Guess I didn't think about that. Well, we will stay here for a while and then we will head out to a tavern or two, with luck we can get the information we need quickly.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

I am going to warn you now this is a bit of a cliffhanger ending. So you have been warned. Again Thanks to everyone who is reading this fiction it is a bit of a practice for me to have dialog so I hope you have all been enjoying.

Chapter 5

Ronon POV

They ate in silence other than an occasional comment about the food, or fine-tuning some plans in the mission. It wasn't long though before it was time to get going.

The first Tavern was a small one near the Inn. It was small, one room with about 20 tables or so, all of which were already occupied. Here the rules about the women were slightly different. While some did stand just behind the men who owned them, some were standing in a section of the room that had been marked off specifically for the women. They stood with their backs to the main part of the room and heads down, the rest were sitting on their man's lap heads down. Ronon thought to himself how wrong the whole thing was. He had never wanted Melina to hide herself away; he wanted everyone to see the beautiful woman that wanted him. Jennifer, he thought, should also be allowed to show herself off fully with out the degrading rules these men placed on their women. Ronon went to the bartender and spoke to him briefly before getting a drink for himself, since the women were not allowed alcohol, and proceeded to a table with four men already sitting there. They had come in alone, Ronon had found out from the bartender, and according to him, they came in every now and then always these four and never with women, which had made them stand out.

"This seat taken?" Ronon asked, as he sat not bothering to wait for an answer. Once he was seated, he reached back and grabbed Jennifer's arm and pulled her down on to his lap, remembering her complaint about her feet. He put his arm around her waist and leaned in to whisper in her ear to keep her ears open.

"What do you want?" asked the man who appeared to be the leader.

"Well, from all I am hearing you guys aren't exactly locals are you?" Ronon responded, moving his arm from Jennifer's waist to her shoulder.

"Yeah what of it?"

"Well, we aren't really locals here either." Ronon replied, indicating Jennifer and himself. When had his thumb started to rub that patch of skin on Jennifer's shoulder? "I am not exactly made for being a farmer or a merchant. I am looking for more action, you know where I might be able to get some of that?"

"Why do you think we would know anything about what you are talking about?"

"Well, if not you then I am guessing someone you either work for or maybe one of your associates."

"You aren't going to give up are you? Well, I might know of where you can get what you are looking for but it might be a bit much for her." The leader said indicating Jennifer, with a nod in her direction.

"She is a healer, one of the best in fact, she can keep myself and anyone else with me alive should anything happen." Ronon responded tightening his arm around her shoulder protectively, briefly, before continuing. "She comes with me."

"Well no one said you were even going to be coming along with us."

"Your loss then." Ronon replied lifting Jennifer from his lap. "We're going. These men will be no help."

They walked out of the Tavern. Once clear of the door Ronon turned sharply down an alley and crouched down low pulling Jennifer with him.

"What are we doing?" Jennifer asked.

"We are waiting for them to leave. I am sure they are who we are looking for. They will probably be leaving in a few minutes since they have been figured out. Ah here they are."

Ronon counted to 20, and then he stood and began to follow them as they headed out of town. Ronon stopped for a minute at the edge of town looking down at Jennifer. He would rather she could stay in town rather then going into the woods after these four men, but it was out of the question. The Inn was too far for her to try and get to without anyone seeing her, he wouldn't let her stay out in the open without him, and John and Teyla would take too long to get here, so the only thing he could do was take her with him and hope things went well. He made a quick decision if she was coming with him; he was going to make sure that she had a weapon. He reached down and unfastened the knife he had strapped to his ankle, and handed it over to Jennifer.

"Put this on and if anything happens, and I mean anything, I want you to run and once you are safe contact John and tell them what happened. If you can't get away and get safe, use that." Ronon instructed her while she shakily strapped the knife to her leg. If anyone from the town saw her, the knife would be obvious and she could be in trouble, but lucky for them they were on their way out of town.Jennifer POV

As she was strapping the knife to her leg she couldn't stop the tremble in her hands. When it was securely fastened around her leg, she looked up at Ronon and nodded.

"Okay I'm ready let's go." She told him. Her voice was steadier than she would have imagined possible.

Ronon nodded and began to follow the four men with Jennifer right behind him.As they followed, Jennifer was mindful of where she put her feet. She didn't want to make any noise that might alert the group in front of them they were being followed. So far, they seemed oblivious that Ronon and her were behind them. As the four men walked through the silent woods, Ronon and Jennifer were able to catch snippets of their conversation and they now knew the names of the four men they followed. From the sound if it, the leader was called Jamril, the other three were Riclamin, Jamkas and Jamlamim.

Try as she might though to keep her mind on what she was doing her mind continued to wander back to the Tavern. She had been sitting on Ronon's lap, his arm around her waist and then on her shoulder. Oh, when his thumb had begun to gently rub the flesh that it had found there she didn't know if he was doing it on purpose or if he even realized he was doing it. What would it feel like to have his hands roaming all over her body and not just that little spot of her shoulder?

Unfortunately, as her mind began to wonder she stopped concentrating on where her feet were going. She didn't see the rock that was on the ground and when she put her weight down she lost her balance and started to fall. She cried out on reflex, breaking the silence in the woods all around them, as she fell. If the four had not realized they had been followed they defiantly knew now.

TBC

Authors Note PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!! Sorry sorry sorry


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Ronon POV Ronon heard Jennifer cry out and turned in time to catch her before she fell. He knew they had been found out, and they had to get out of there fast.

"Are you hurt?" he asked quickly.

"No I'm fine. Ronon, I'm sorry I wasn't…"

"Don't worry about it now. We have to hurry." he soothed, as he looked over his shoulder in the direction of shouting voices.

He grabbed her hand and they began running towards town. He knew he was pushing her hard but they had to get to safety. He also knew that going to town was a bad idea so making a split decision he turned sharply to the left heading away from the gate and the town.

When Jennifer tripped over a tree root, the only thing that kept her upright was his hand still holding hers. He stopped and looked around, noticing a thick growth of bushes close by. Ronon pushed her to the bushes knowing it could hide them at least until he could figure out something better.

"This way," he told her. "Crawl in until I tell you to stop. Then I want you to lie down as flat as you can get. We can rest here for a minute so you can catch your breath but you are going to have to stay as quite as you can, okay?"

She nodded and began to crawl into the brush. He looked around to see if he could see any sign of their pursuers. He looked back to the bushes and couldn't see Jennifer. He told her to lay down where she was, and then crawled in after her. He tried to cover any sign that they had gone into the bushes and knew that only a well-trained tracker could find them. He hoped that they didn't have one with them. Once he found where Jennifer had hid herself, he laid next to her on his stomach.

He heard the sounds of approaching footsteps and put a finger to his lips telling Jennifer that the four men after them where near, and it was time to be quiet. Then the footsteps grew closer and stopped near where they where hiding.

"I can't tell where they went with the ground here; it is too difficult to tell," one of the men said.

"It is probably that guy from the Tavern. Jamkas, Riclamin, I want you two to go back to town and ask around. Hopefully someone knows something. Jamlamim, go back to camp; they might still turn up there. Meanwhile I will head back to the base and see what the boss wants us to do about these two," Jamril said.

Ronon and Jennifer stayed hidden in the brush for about 30 minutes before emerging from their cover.

"What do we do now?" Jennifer asked cautiously.

"First we are going to find a better shelter, and then we are going to contact John and Teyla. We have to get moving now even though the sun will be setting soon."

Jennifer nodded but kept her eyes cast downward avoiding his eyes. Ronon knew that she was blaming herself; she might even be thinking that he was mad at her. He wanted to tell her otherwise but it would have to wait till he knew they were safe.

He took a moment to take a better look around and saw a good place to start. A few miles away was a large hill or actually, it might be more like a small mountain with what looked like an almost flat side. If it didn't have a good place to hide, they could at least climb up and get a better view of the surrounding area.

They walked in silence. Ronon looked over at Jennifer from time to time yet her only focus was the ground at her feet, rather she was watching her feet making sure not to trip. He knew he would have to wait till they were safe to talk to her, but he wanted to console her, so he placed a hand on her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze before pulling his hand away.

When they got to the mountain, it proved to be a perfect place to stay. On the flat side, there was a part that looked almost like a giant had scooped out a portion of the rock making a sort of cave with plenty of nooks and crannies to not only protect them from the weather but also allow them to go unseen if someone came upon them. It could also be easily defended, and the spring running along the side of the mountain would provide them with water.

He got Jennifer inside then contacted John and told him what had happened and described the men that they had meet and talked to. John said that he and Teyla would keep an eye out and if they saw them, they would follow, but assuming they didn't the four would meet up the next morning and take

things from there.

"Well, it looks like we will be staying here for the tonight. We'll gather dead and fallen leaves to spread on the ground to make the ground more comfortable to sleep on."Jennifer nodded but still said nothing and still refused to meet his eyes.

Once enough leaves had been gathered for them both to make decent makeshift sleeping mats Jennifer sat on hers and took her sandals off. He saw the wince of pain as she slipped the sandal off her right foot.

Ronon sat down by her feet, picked up her right foot, and placed it on his lap. He could see the bruise that was beginning to form on the top of her foot from where it had hit the tree root, and he began to massage her foot.

"Jennifer, you can't beat yourself up over this. Accidents happen, and I am not mad at you or blaming you."

"It is my fault that we are in this situation in the first place. I wasn't paying attention to where I was walking and then when I stumbled I shouted out alerting them that we were behind them. Then while we were running to get away I tripped over a stupid root, almost falling on my face."

"Look at me." Ronon told her and waited till she meet his eyes. "You are a Doctor not a fighter; this isn't something you have been trained to do. You have done very well considering you aren't used to this sort of thing."

"But you must realize that if you had been teamed up with Teyla this would probably never have happened, everything would have gone just as planned. Get in, get info, and get out."

"That is possible, but then again if I had been teamed up with Teyla and everything had gone as planed I would have been bored." he said with a smile.

She stared at him for a moment before she saw the smile start to spread on his lips and she laughed.

"It figures you would be the only person on Atlantis who would want a mission to go wrong and find yourself in some sort of trouble." she responded. Feeling that he had ignored her left foot, he picked that one up and began to give it the same ministrations that he had just given to her right foot. "That feels so nice."

"That is the idea." Ronon told her as he continued to rub her foot.

After a few minutes, Ronon looked out towards the entrance of the cave, and then placed her foot down off his lap. He stood and headed out without a word to Jennifer because while rubbing her feet Jennifer had laid back and he thought she had fallen asleep.

"What is it, something wrong?" She asked sitting up quickly, reaching for her sandals.

"No, I just want to go out and set up some traps in case anyone comes along."

As he went about setting traps that had become second nature to him while he was a runner, he found his mind drifting off to the cave and the woman sitting inside. He had only meant to talk to her, to make her stop beating herself up as John would say. Then as she took the sandals from her feet and he saw the pain cross her face, that urge to protect her had kicked in, and all he wanted was to take the pain away. He didn't know when he started caring about her comfort, placing so much importance on it, but it just felt so right to him.

When he was finished, he went back to the cave and in the dying light saw her lying on her mat. He sat nearby with his back against the rock wall and watched the entrance.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Jennifer POV

Jennifer hadn't meant to fall asleep while Ronon was out setting up his traps, but she had laid beck down after he left and everything caught up with her. Plus Ronon's impromptu foot massage had relaxed her. She knew she was safe with him. He was after all the best fighter on Atlantis, and anyone who could spend years one step ahead of the wraith could certainly keep ahead of four of Michael's goons.

She didn't know how long she slept, she did remember the dreams though. The one where after being out side Ronon came back into the cave he walked over to where she was sleeping and pulled her into his arms and softly kissed the top of her head. Then she heard this sound that seemed so out of place.

Her eyes flew open and she could clearly hear someone yelling. Ronon ran past her and to the entrance of the cave. He looked out into the night trying to see what was visible in the moonlight. Looking back at Jennifer he motioned with his hands for her to stay, and then slipped out without making a sound.

Jennifer got up and sat with her back to the rock wall and knees up to her chest. For her own comfort she pulled the knife from its sheath and held it in her hand. She kept her eyes trained on the cave opening.

She heard a small commotion coming from outside just before Ronon came in with one of them men from the Tavern. She could see that the man was injured the way he was holding his left arm told her that. She just didn't know how bad yet. She immediately put her knife away and went into Doctor mode.

"What happened?" Jennifer asked while examining the wound in his ar,. She looked at him but he gave no indication of answering her.

"He hit his arm against a tree branch when he tripped the trap. He ended up getting stabbed by it. He has also decided that he was going to clam up he hasn't said anything since I got to him." Ronon told her keeping his eyes trained on the prisoner.

Jennifer looked more closely at the mans arm, who hardly seemed to notice her presence at all. She really needed the few medical supplies she had packed before leaving Atlantis; however, they were all back at the Inn. First thing she needed though was to stop the bleeding. She didn't have much in the way of extra material that would serve as good bandages, Ronon however had a shirt and a vest of thicker stuff than hers.

"Ronon I need you vest," Jennifer held her arm out waiting for the cloth to be dropped into her hand.

When she felt the cloth in her hand she pulled out her knife, which was coming in quite handy, and cut the material into strips. She tied one of the strips tightly around the mans arm, it would have to be enough for now.

"That should help for now," she said standing and facing Ronon. "I wish I had my medical supplies there could be infection."

"He'll be fine till tomorrow, we'll take him with us." Ronon said he looked at her and then back to the man. "I am going to need something to tie him up with. The top part of your wrap should do."

Jennifer took the wrap from off her shoulder and held it out. Ronon grab the skirt as close as he could to where it was knotted around her waist and cut it with a knife, that she didn't even see him pull out. After he cut it from her outfit he took the fabric and cut it in half and used part to tie the mans feet and the rest to tie his hands behind his back.

"Be careful or you'll make that arm worse." Jennifer chastised.

"He'll live," Ronon said standing up and walking over to her. "You should go lay down try and get some more sleep," he told her leading her back to her sleep mat.

Jennifer nodded and laid down she doubted she would get any sleep, but she didn't feel like arguing either. She closed her eyes and relaxed.

She must have fallen asleep at some point though, because the next thing she knew Ronon was gently shaking her awake with a hand on her shoulder.

"We need to get going soon." He told her quietly.

"Okay let me check his arm and put my sandals on then I will be ready."

Jennifer felt his eyes following her as she headed over to the still silent prisoner and changed his bandage. She check to see any signs of infection and while he still needed to have the wound properly cleaned and wrapped. Ronon was right though he would survive till they got him back to Atlantis.

Ronon got the man on his feet and pushed him out in front of them. Jennifer was glad to see an end of this mission in sight. They walked through the woods for almost an hour before they found John and Teyla.

"Well looks like you made a new friend," John said looking over the man that Ronon kept in front of him.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Well I should warn you that while writing this chapter I was in an odd mood and I wrote this chapter like 3 times. It seems to me a bit out of place but No matter what I wrote it always came out pretty much the same.

Thanks for everyone who has continued to read this story and I and hope you continue to enjoy it.

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Chapter 8

Ronon POV

Ronon didn't sleep during the night. When he first returned to the cave after setting up his traps he found Jennifer asleep. He was enthralled; she was so relaxed and peaceful in sleep. When she was awake she was so busy working and concentrating on her work, and even though he had seen her when she was more relaxed and smiling this was different. She had been asleep a few hours when she let out a soft, breathy sigh and shifted just ever so slightly in her sleep, and Ronon wondered what, or who, she was dreaming about.

Then the yell broke the silence of the night and he looked toward the cave entrance and Jennifer jumped awake. Ronon ran to the entrance to the cave, but when he looked out into the night he saw no movement. Looking back at Jennifer he caught her eye and made a stay motion with his hands, and then he ran out in the direction of the yelling.

When he found the man and got him down he asked the man his name and what he was doing there, but all he got in return was silence.He kept the man in front of him, in case he tried to run, the whole way back to the cave. When they walked in Jennifer jumped up and went to tend to the mans injury. Ronon noticed that she used the knife he had given her and was happy to see that she seemed to be comfortable using it.

While she worked he kept his eyes trained on the captive. If the man made the wrong move then Ronon would do whatever was necessary to protect Jennifer.

When Jennifer was finished he wanted to get her far from the prisoner and out of harms way, but he couldn't leave the man unbound. He looked down at Jennifer and noticed the wrap and realized that would be the best option considering he no longer had his vest. When he told her about his needing her wrap, without thought she took it off her shoulder and held it out from the waist where it was knotted. He noticed the trust that she placed in him. Even after almost 3 years on Atlantis there were those that still had fear of him and he even saw distrust, but she never did.

When she lay back down, like he suggested, and went back to sleep, he sat where he could watch both her and the captive.

It was about an hour after the sunrise that he had to wake her. When he placed his hand on her shoulder to wake her he found it warm and so smooth beneath his hand. He was a bit surprised at himself. He had meant only to wake her and he felt that if there had been time he would like nothing more than to explore the rest of her and find out if the rest of her was as smooth. He also knew that despite what he would like to do it was impossible.

As they walked to through the woods he kept his eyes out for the other three men who were at the Tavern with the man currently tied and marching through the woods. From what Ronon could tell those three were not around.

When they meet up with Teyla and John, John was curious to know about everything that had happened since the two teams split up. Ronon told John about the highlights as they all headed to the gate.

* * *

Jennifer

Jennifer walked a bit slower than the rest and fell behind by a few feet. Teyla noticed though as John and Ronon were in discussion about what the plan was and about watching the captive man.

"Is there anything wrong?" Teyla asked, concern written on her face.

"No, I was just thinking it is probably stupid." Jennifer told her friend and herself.

"Sometimes it helps to talk out a problem."

"Well, like I said it is stupid, but sometimes I wonder where I stand with Ronon."

"What do you mean? Has something happened during the mission?"

"You remember the malfunction that caused the system to go into quarantine, well, of course you do. Well, as you know Ronon and I were trapped in the infirmary and at first it was kind of awkward and weird. Then Ronon told me about a woman he cared about who had died back on Sateda. It was a different side of him. I thought to myself that what I was seeing was something that very few on Atlantis ever saw. Then later, after we tried to get out of the infirmary by blowing the oxygen tank, what I got is possibly the closest thing anyone on Atlantis can get to an apology from him." Jennifer paused in her recount and looked at Ronon as he continued his walk through the woods completely unaware of the conversation taking place just feet behind him.

"An apology for what?" Teyla asked.

"He told me that when I first got to Atlantis he thought I was weak and that I didn't belong."

"He told you that?" Teyla asked, taken aback.

"Yes, but he said that he was wrong. He told me I had proved myself. We almost kissed that day. Yet it seems like since then he will pull away, and then there are other times when I think I see something in him that wants something more. I just don't know what is going on." Jennifer said, looking back at the ground, still mindful that she didn't want to fall again.

"Ronon has been through a lot since the wraith attack on Sateda; it is possible that he is trying to figure things out about himself. I doubt that he would ever do something intentionally to hurt you." Teyla soothed.

"I know it is ridiculous to think things like this but I don't like this not knowing. I am probably just being petty and I should be happy when he does show me that part of him that isn't the solider."

"If you care for him tell him, he should know. Ronon is a strong fighter and he takes great risk when it comes to keeping everyone around him safe without regard to his own safety. The heart though, is different when broken. It takes much longer to heal than any physical injury. It is possible that he is just afraid that he will get his heart broken again and that would be devastating to him. I have seen how he looks at you and I know that there are positive feelings there."

Jennifer said nothing, but nodded and let what Teyla said sink in. She watched Ronon as he and John came to a stop in front of the DHD. Finally it was time to go back home, back to Atlantis.

TBC

* * *

Like I said it is an odd chapter I apologize I was watching Chocolat while I was writing and this is what I kept getting.


	9. Chapter 9

I just yet again want to thank everyone reading and reviewing this story. And I want to again thank my beta who I drive crazy with my ending chapter when I do.

* * *

Chapter 9

Jennifer

Once back on Atlantis, Jennifer told the marines who where given charge of the prisoner to take him to the infirmary to get his arm looked at. Then she headed to her quarters for a nice hot, all though quick, shower. She would have preferred a nice long hot bubble bath, but she didn't have the time. She had to attend the debriefing in an hour, so after her too quick shower she got dressed in a nice clean uniform. She never thought that she would ever love putting on her uniform, preferring her more casual clothes that she hardly got to wear on Atlantis, bur after the very reveling outfit she had to wear she was happy to get comfortable again.

During the debriefing, they found out that Ronon and she had had the most luck as far as getting any information on Michael and his location. Although all they had to show for all their "luck" was one still very un-talkative captive. It was decided though that the prisoner would be questioned later during the day after he was moved to the brig.

Jennifer noticed that during the meeting, Ronon had glanced her way several times. The only reason she even noticed was because he was sitting on the other side of the table. These looks were what gave her the courage to ask him after they were released from the meeting if he wanted to go to the cafeteria for a late lunch as neither had eaten since the day before. She smiled when he agreed, feeling that maybe she would be able to have that conversation with Ronon that Teyla had suggested.

"Hey, you guys about to go grab a bite? Mind if I join you?" John asked enthusiastically.

"John, I do not think that they would appreciate you inviting yourself." Teyla said reproachfully.

"Oh, yeah." John said looking back at Teyla. "So, mind if we join you?"

"Why not." Jennifer said slightly deflated. She didn't want to have John examining her reasons if she were to say no, so she had to say he could join. "The more the merrier, right?"

Teyla gave her an apologetic smile and wrapped her arm around Jennifer's shoulders in a quick hug. Jennifer was glad for the sentiment in the gesture. Teyla took the moment to whisper in her ear that there would be another time.

Rodney joined them during the meal and the five of them talked about the customs of the planet and some of the curiosities seen by the four that were on the mission. Rodney complained about not going again, sighting that he could have been useful. Jennifer was doing her best to keep up her side of the conversation but found that difficult when every time Ronon moved, his leg would brush her own. Eventually Ronon shifted the conversation to some of the weapons that he had seen and bought. He was happy that he had hidden them on himself before they had headed to the Tavern. At the end, the conversation went to the man who was by now in the brig.

When they had finished their meal they went their separate ways; John and Ronon headed with Rodney to the brig. Teyla went back to her quarters to spend time with her son who had been napping before the debriefing. Jennifer headed to the infirmary to get some work done.

Her day was fairly normal. She looked over the reports from another mission team that had apparently had a fight with a plant that gave them a poison ivy type rash. She worked on some of her research for coming up with a way to help those who had been given Michael's "improved" Hothen virus. After a couple hours, even Rodney came in complaining that he had gotten some life threatening disease. Jennifer had thought he had gone to the brig and asked him about it. He only said that he got bored after about 35 minutes of John repeating the same questions and Ronon's growling.

Later, Jennifer found herself in her office writing up her mission report, or at least trying to write up her mission report. She looked at the clock on her computer and saw that two hours had passed since she had sat down to work on it and she had hardly managed to get much written. Her mind kept wandering off and it would wander over to Ronon and events that had nothing to do with the mission. She would think about sitting on his lap, the foot massage he had given her and of course the dream that would not go away. Her mind had drifted to him ever since the quarantine but this was different. Now her mind went beyond just what if they had kissed to feeling his hands on her feet, legs, arms, and back. She shook herself. This wasn't getting the report done.

After another 45 minutes of getting nothing accomplished other than her needing another shower, and this time a cold one; Jennifer signed and decided that she needed rest, and she would work on the report later. She got her stuff tidied up and headed back to her quarters.

When she got there, she went in to change and go through her nighttime routine. As she walked into her bathroom, she noticed that she had yet to do anything with the outfit she had worn during the mission, and something that didn't belong to her.

* * *

Ronon

Ronon's eyes kept wondering over to Jennifer during the debriefing. He had thought that when they got back to Atlantis and back into more normal clothing that things would be better. He thought he would be able to concentrate on something other than her. Instead, it seemed the exact opposite had happened. He knew she was wearing her uniform but all he could see was smooth, pale, creamy skin and the blue outfit she wore. He could remember where every freckle was. He knew it was because he had not known what was under her uniform but now he knew and he wanted to see more.

He could have beaten John to a pulp when he invited himself to lunch, and maybe at their next sparing match he would. He also knew that if John had realized that his timing was off he would have stayed away. John had asked him about dating the day Carson had died and he knew that John had asked because he was a friend that wanted to see Ronon was not alone.

Lunch was actually not bad as he feared. He had sat next to Jennifer and during the course of the meal, he would purposely shift and brush his leg against hers, and as she never moved her leg, he figured that she either didn't mind or didn't realize. The talk went around about the planet, Rodney complaining, the weapons he bought and then about the prisoner. Too soon though it was time to get on with business.

In the Brig, the man still refused to talk. Ronon was sure he knew who the man was and that his name was probably Jamlamim, but knowing the man's name did little to get any info from him. Ronon knew that if he could have some quality time with the man he could get him to talk. Ronon also knew that the people from Earth would not allow it. They almost didn't let him talk to Kavanagh when they had thought he was responsible for the potential destruction on Atlantis.

"Come on Ronon, let's go. We can talk to Mr. Chatter Box later." John said standing and walking out the door.

"This is ridiculous." Ronon growled. "We shouldn't leave; we should keep trying."

"We have been at this for hours and he still isn't talking. I need a break. I don't like listening to the sound of my own voice, unlike Rodney. Look, he will talk eventually." John said, trying to calm Ronon down.

"And when he does it will probably be too late if it isn't already." Ronon said angrily, as he headed off to his quarters.

He wasn't there very long when a knock informed him that he had a visitor. He thought for a minute or two about ignoring whoever it was, but with a sigh, he waved his hand over the crystals that would open the door. The moment the door opened, he was glad he had. Jennifer was standing on the outside of his door holding his knife and sheath in her hand.

"I believe this is yours. Thank you for letting me borrow it.", she told him with a smile.TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Jennifer

Ronon looked down at the knife that she held in her outstretched hand then back up to her face. She wondered why he wasn't reaching for the knife and thought that maybe she had made a mistake in coming to see him.

"No, that is not mine." he told her looking back at the knife in her hand.

"Oh, well, I thought that since you had it on the mission and you have so many that it was yours. Whose is it so I can return it?" she asked bringing her hand back.

"No, it was mine, but I want you to keep it."

"So you are giving to me?"

"Under one condition. I want you to promise that whenever you go off world you take that knife with you."

She was tempted to try to make fun of her poor abilities on the mission with him and opened her mouth to say something she hoped would sound funny and witty. Then she saw the look that was on his face. She wasn't sure what it was she was seeing, as he was usually unreadable so she changed her mind. "I promise and I thank you."

Jennifer tucked the knife away into her pocket and took a deep breath. She had used the knife as an excuse to come and talk to Ronon and now was her chance. She had gone over and over in her head what she wanted to say to him. She knew what she wanted to ask him, but now here she stood in front of him and couldn't say a thing. Has he always been this tall she wondered?

"Ronon, I wanted to ask you something, and if I am stepping out of bounds just tell me. I wondered if…um…well that is…would you teach me how to use this knife?" she asked. She was mentally kicking herself and cursed herself for not coming out and asking what she really wanted the answer to.

"You used the knife on the mission and you seemed to know what to do then." he said.

"No, I mean I can take it with me but if I get in trouble other than holding this in my hand I am not going to know what to do."

"Well, then I can teach you some basics."

"Right, well, then when should we start?"

"Well, other than talking to the man in the brig I have very little to do tomorrow." Ronon told her.

"Okay, that works. My shift will be over in the early evening so how about we get started then."

"Right, see you then."

"Well, that should be it then so I'll let you go back to whatever I interrupted." Jennifer said as she turned to walk back to her quarters, still mentally calling herself all sorts of coward.

She tossed and turned most of the night. When she did actually sleep, she had dreams of running through a forest. She saw Ronon reaching out for her and yelling but she couldn't hear what he was telling her, and so many other jumbled images. When her alarm went off to tell her it was time to get up and get ready for work she felt worse than she had the night before. Tonight for sure when I see him for training I tell him everything, I can't do another night like this she told herself on her way to the infirmary.Jennifer went about her day doing her best to put aside the thoughts of what she would say when it came time to face Ronon. I

t was only about an hour or so after lunch that the call came over the radio that put all thoughts of her talk with Ronon out of her mind.

"All available medical staff to the gate room for a medical emergency."Jennifer jumped up and grabbed the pack that was always ready in case of just this kind of call, and raced to the gate room knowing that other members of her medical staff would be racing after her.

When Jennifer and her medical personnel got to the gate room her heart and stomach both dropped to her toes. Major Lorne and Col. Sheppard were helping with marines that looked to be in bad shape. Then her eyes were drawn to the very prone body of Ronon who looked as if he had walked through the gate and then just dropped.

"What happened?" Jennifer asked, needing to know what had happened to the men. Ronon hadn't said he was leaving on a mission today. She was examining Ronon as John started to tell her what happened.

"We went back to the planet to see if we could find the camp made by those men."

"Did they do this?" Jennifer asked, while taking in the wounds Ronon had received. He had been shot in the leg; he also had a number of cuts. He would need surgery and possibly a few stitches to some of the deeper wounds.

"No, we found them and followed them to the gate. We watched to see the address they dialed and we followed them. The group on that planet did this to us."

Ronon was the worst of the injured. One marine had been shot in the arm but it was just a flesh wound, one had fallen in the retreat and broken his ankle (to which he was going to get a lot of teasing from the other marines Jennifer had no doubt), yet another marine had a dislocated shoulder and even John had managed to get a knock to the back of the head. Jennifer knew that her team was more then capable to handle the less injured while she had Ronon taken into the OR for surgery.

The operation was a complete success, Ronon was going to be fine, and he was lucky. If the bullet had been just two inches to the left, it would have hit his femoral artery and if that had happened, he would have surely bled out. The other marines had all been taken care of. Stitches had been given along with a cast, a sling and painkillers. Jennifer went around, checked in on everyone, and looked at their charts. She wanted to have a chance to talk more with the marines who had been on the mission but knew that they would be busy and she would have to wait.

As much as she would have liked to spend the rest of her day in the room with Ronon watching the steady rise and fall of his chest, and watching the heart monitor with its rhythmic motions showing that his heart was beating at a good restful pace; she knew it would be impossible. So instead, she went through her day desperately trying to keep herself busy hoping that the day would go by faster. She found herself walking past his bed a lot more than was necessary but couldn't make herself stop.

Finally, when her shift was over she went to see Ronon. When she got to his room, she saw that Teyla, the baby and John were all there to see their now awake friend.

"Hello how are you feeling?" Jennifer asked, looking over his stats.

"I have been worse." Ronon told her.

"Well, you look like hell big guy." John joked. "You are lucky that we were close enough to the gate that the Doc here could patch you up."

"Sorry to cut this short but Ronon needs his rest now. You can come back and see him later." Jennifer said as an excuse to have some alone time with Ronon.

"Yeah, okay, you get better okay, man." John told him as he headed for the door.

"We will see you tomorrow Ronon. Take it easy." Teyla said as she too made her way to the door.

Even the baby gurgled as they left. Jennifer watched as they headed out of the infirmary. She also noticed John's arm. It was wrapped around Teyla's shoulder before they turned the corner where she could no longer see them. She was going to have to remember to ask Teyla about her relationship with John later, but for now she turned her mind and face to the big Satedan on the bed beside her.

TBC

* * *

Author's Note at least I didn't stop before you knew that Ronon was going to be okay and remember if you kill me you wont know how it ends.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Ronon

Ronon watched as Jennifer turned back towards him, well, actually it was more like around him as she wasn't meeting his eyes. He figured there must be something on her mind but he wanted to see what she had to say before he said anything. When she had stopped by the night before, was it really only last night? and tried to give him the knife back, he had that feeling again. That feeling that said he needed to keep her safe and protected. He knew that she was a doctor and was not really able to use the knife to defend herself but it made him feel better to know she had it, and after hearing what had happened on New Athos he knew that if pushed hard enough she would use it. Her promise made him feel better about her going on future missions without him.

After she had left with plans to see him again later the next day, he felt he had something to look forward to. That is the thought that stayed with him as he drifted off into a night of dreams of eyes that changed with the light. When he woke the next day he was well rested and ready for another day of talking to a man who would still probably say nothing.

When he met up with John at breakfast though, John had some other ideas. John had thought of a new strategy and after a talk with Col Carter it was decided that the two of them would go back to the planet and see if they could find the camp that Michael's men had made, and see what they could find. Ronon was more than happy about the new plan; at least he would feel like he was going out and doing something other than just letting these men slip away. It was going to be an easy and probably pretty fast mission and he would still be back in time to meet with Jennifer. He felt that his day could not be better.

The two men got to the planet and Ronon was able to get them to the men's camp where they saw the three remaining men packing up. Ronon and John stayed hidden and watched the men leave. They followed them to the gate, and seeing the address they dialed, both men had the same thought; they needed to get to that planet today.

They dialed Atlantis and had a brief meeting with Col. Carter who agreed they needed to act immediately. John wanted Major Lorne and his men to go with them to the new planet and see what they could find. So about 30 minutes after getting back to Atlantis they were leaving again, this time with the Majors team.

Everything was quiet when they stepped through the gate. There was nothing near them other than the typical wooded area so common in this galaxy. The only visible traces of humans was a small trail that led off into the woods. They followed the trail quietly, all thinking the same thing; if they were lucky, today would be the day that the Michael threat would be over.

Ronon don't know what made him stop when he did, but something felt wrong to him. He was opening his mouth to say something when the loud sounds of gunfire rang out. For just a second there was confusion, but everyone quickly returned fire from their unseen attackers. Ronon and the others would liked to have stayed and fought, but the attackers had the advantage. They had no choice but to fall back.

He didn't see what happened to John. All Ronon knew was John was fine, then just a few moments later John had a hand to the back of his head. The hint of blood let him know that John had been hit with something. When John bent down to help a fallen marine, Ronon saw them both struggling and he ran to them to help. That was when he felt it; the fire of pain as he was shot in the leg. He did his best to ignore the pain he felt. He tried to stay as close to the trees along the path back to the gate as much for cover as to see if he could make out the men attacking them and take a few out. All he actually managed to do was break a few branches and give himself more injuries.

When they got to the gate Ronon helped by laying down some cover fire and letting Major Lorne dial the DHD. They didn't return to Atlantis immediately; instead they dialed an abandoned planet and from there they dialed Atlantis. The reason being they didn't want their attackers to know the address to Atlantis; let them search an empty planet. From this abandoned planet they went back to Atlantis. Ronon limped through the gate and looked to see that everyone had made it before he gave in to the darkness.

When he woke up he had visitors, but before anyone could say anything Jennifer was there in the room checking in on him. He wanted to know what happened to everyone else on the mission to see if everyone made it back okay, but Jennifer shooed his teammates away. Not that he was going to complain; he did have plans to see her tonight' only this wasn't quite how things were supposed to be.

* * *

Jennifer

"So, like John said you were very lucky. That bullet came very close to killing you." Jennifer told him, feeling tears welling up in her eyes. She couldn't quite seem to look him in the eye. She thought if she did it would make everything too real and she couldn't handle that right now.

"Guess this means that I won't be giving you any lessons anytime soon." Ronon said jokingly.

Jennifer's eyes shot to meet his when he made his joke. She snapped and suddenly she was angry.

"How can you make jokes about that? You could have died and you think it is time to make jokes and be funny!" While yelling at him she had walked closer to his bedside. "I thought you were going to be staying here today. You could have died, and I was too much of a coward to talk to you last night like I had planned. I was scared to death when I saw you on the floor of the gate room and you make jokes!"

Ronon opened his mouth and then closed it again. Jennifer could see the confusion written all over his face and if she hadn't been so scared for him and angry she might have laughed. She realized then that he had no idea why she was yelling at him like that and knew she needed to explain herself.

"I'm sorry, let me start over and please don't say anything till I am finished or I might not get through this." Jennifer said more quietly. Then taking a deep breath she prepared herself for the talk she had intended to give him the night before.

"I thought when I got here that I wasn't cut out to be here. There was too much expected of me and I had never been in charge of a department like this. I also didn't know how to relate to the people here, you especially. When I saw you, all I saw was this guy who could probably break me in half without even breaking a sweat! Then we were stuck in the infirmary together and I was nervous. I mean we had never actually had a real conversation before, and now there we were with nothing but time. You tried to make me feel better about the situation we were in and then you told me about the woman that you lost. I knew I was seeing a side of you that very few people on Atlantis had ever seen, and that had probably not been seen by many people in years. I never knew that you could be like that and I felt so honored that I was allowed to see it. Later when we talked and you shifted closer to me I kept thinking that any second I would wake up; things were just too good. When we almost kissed I thought to myself that there had to be a catch, that someone like you would never give me the time of day, let alone be interested enough to kiss me. I was disappointed when those doors opened because I thought there goes my only chance. After that, I know we were both busy and we never really talked about it. For my part, I would rather have that memory as it was thinking that you wanted that kiss as much as I did. I feared that if we talked I would find out that you would rather have given it up to we might have been seconds away from dying and just wanted to go out on a kiss. When we were near each after that thought, all I could think about was that almost kiss and my mind would wonder. There were times I hoped that you felt the same, and others when I thought you would rather it had never happened. I went to see you last night not only to give you the knife back; I wanted to tell you all of this then but I was too chicken, and today you could have been killed. Even if you want nothing to do with me, and who could blame you; I am sure that you think I am completely crazy right now. I needed you to know that I care for you."

She ended her speech softly but knowing that he had heard every word. She didn't want to look in his eyes and see rejection so she looked at the floor. She knew she had to face him, and the repercussion of her speech, so she took another deep breath and raised her eyes to stare into the penetrating green eyes of Ronon Dex; who at that moment had the ability to give her heaven or squash her like a bug under his boot.

She met his eyes and was encouraged to see that he didn't look repulsed by what she said, but she was still nervous over the look of shock that covered his face.

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

Well here is the next chapter and I asked some people over at the GateWorld Forum wither I should do a happy R/J end up together at the end of this chapter or I should go through some Angst first and well Angst won ( I did bribe them by telling them they would get more chapters this way) I hope you like it and I might post the original chapter later.

* * *

Chapter 12

Ronon

Ronon had told the joke to lighten the mood, if nothing else get her to actually look at him and if he was really lucky he might even get a laugh. He never thought that when she looked at him he would see unshed tears reflecting her beautiful brown eyes. Then he saw the anger flash in her eyes just as she began to yell at him.

The last time he had felt this small, this terrible, he had been a Runner and found out that because he stayed the night in an innocent village, that village had been destroyed. This though was something different but just as bad. He remembered when he was nine he was out play fighting, sparing, with some friends. They were pretending to be great commanders, winning this big battle against the wraith; one that would save the galaxy. When he had finally come home, late, his mother was there and he could see she had been crying and she reached out to him and hugged him to her tight, then she pushed on his shoulders and yelled at him for making her worry. He got the same feeling now and just like with his mother, he hated it more than he could say.

When she stopped yelling at him he didn't know what he could say to take away that hurt and fear. He thought about apologizing and opened his mouth to say so, but he knew that it would not be enough to make her feel better, just like with his mother all those years ago. So instead, he closed his mouth and waited to see if she had anything else to add that he could comment on. Maybe she would say something that would give him an idea of what to say to make things right with her again.

When she started her speech, he wasn't sure where she was going with it, but as she continued to speak, he began to see that this was something that she had been wanting to say for some time now.

He didn't know what to say to what she had just revealed to him. He had not taken his eyes from her during her outburst and even through her speech. He watched as her eyes fell to the floor. He was aware that if he did not say something soon she would take his silence to mean his rejection and then she would walk away and then he might lose his chance with her forever, he couldn't let happen.

"I…I don't know what to say." Ronon told her honestly and watched as her eyes fell to the floor and she turned and headed out the door. He was losing her before he could even find the words to tell her how he felt.

"Wait! Jennifer, come back!" He hollered after her but she either ignored him or didn't hear him, which was possible but very unlikely.What had he done? He was mad at himself for not being able to find a way to tell her how often she was in his thoughts; how much her safety had become to him. He balled up his fist and slammed it on the bed.

The slight pain he felt in his leg was nothing compared to the tightness and pain he felt in his chest.

* * *

Jennifer

Jennifer felt her world crumble with those six little words. She felt the tears burning her eyes and knew that if she stayed in the room with Ronon she would not be able to keep them back. She needed to leave and that is exactly what she did. She walked away from him.

She heard him yell out after her she wondered if the whole tower had heard him. Part of her was tempted to turn around and hear a more through reason as to why he didn't want her, reasons like being from two different galaxy's or him not wanting some weak thing that he would always have to keep safe and therefore putting his own life in danger. These were reasons that she had already thought of and was hoping that could be worked through. At the same time, the rest of her wanted nothing more than the safety of her quarters.

When she reached her quarters she fell on her bed, curled up around a pillow, and let all the tears come. She didn't fight the sobs that wracked her body. All she did was lay there cry and wonder why she had ever thought that he might be interested in her. If he had was interested he would have said so right? He would have told her how sorry he was, he would tell her why he had pulled away from her at times.

She wasn't sure how long she laid there crying before she finally fell asleep. She was only aware of her alarm waking her, and the sun bright and mocking out side her window. She got up, showered, and changed into a clean uniform before she headed for the infirmary.

She allowed herself only once look, one glance over to Ronon's room but that ache in her chest told her that it was one look too many. John was in there with him, and she hoped that Ronon would tell him nothing of her throwing herself at him. When John left, he wasn't in a good mood and Jennifer avoided him, just in case.

She kept herself busy all day and she was proud of herself for ignoring Ronon's room entirely. She had others go in to check on him and make sure he took the medicines he needed after having surgery to remove a bullet. She was so busy ignoring him and not thinking about him she didn't notice that those that checked on him once would not go back to check on him a second time.

Some how she got through her day with out any incident and she had not let herself think about Ronon any more than she actually had to as his doctor. She knew that at sometime she would have to come face to face with him, but she was just happy that it hadn't been today. She needed a few days to get herself to a place where she could talk to him and tell him to forget about everything she had said.

On her way to her quarters, she saw Teyla and her baby headed to the mess hall to get something to eat, and as she realized that she had yet to eat that day she agreed to join the new mother. This would give them a chance to talk, if it was just the three of them Jennifer didn't have to worry about the baby judging or telling anyone about how foolish she had been. Maybe Teyla would tell her just the thing she needed to hear to make this not hurt so much.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Ronon

John came to see him early the next morning. To be honest, Ronon had not slept, and had no idea it was morning till John walked in with fruit and a bright smile. Ronon wasn't in the mood for any of it, and he certainly didn't want to see anyone other than Jennifer walking through the door. He wanted to explain himself and say all those things that he should have said the night before.

"So, big guy, what time are we planning on going for a run today?" John asked.

"What do you want Sheppard?" Ronon growled. He knew that what he was feeling wasn't his friends fault, but right now he didn't care.

"Wow! What happened that put you in such a charming mood?"

"What makes you think I am in a mood?"

"You only call me Sheppard when we are out on missions or mad about something, and as we are not on a mission I would have to say that you are in a bad mood."

"Fine; it is just…" Ronon debated for a moment about telling John what had happened with Jennifer the night before. He knew that John would want him happy and would probably try to give him advice. On the other hand, would John give good advice? He also had to wonder who all John might tell about this and the last thing he needed and he felt the last thing Jennifer wanted was for the whole base to find out. Well, John couldn't make the immediate situation with Jennifer any worse.

"First, you tell anyone what I am about to tell you and I will make sure that you suffer during our next sparring match."

"Got it, whatever you want man."

"Last night after Teyla and you left Jennifer told me that she cared for me." Ronon said, not meeting John's eyes.

"Well, that's great. I thought there was something there after the quarantine. Wait, if she told you that, why are you in a bad mood? I would figure that you would be happy." John said confused by what he had heard and Ronon's mood.

"Things didn't go well. When she was finished speaking I didn't know what to say; I was surprised. I told her I didn't know what to say, and before I could say anything else she was out of the room."

"Oh I see." John said sitting down in the chair in the room. "Well how do you feel, if I might ask? I mean to me it always seemed like you and the Doc would make a good couple."

"I do like her and it is just perfect that when I finally feel like I am ready to move on, I go and mess things up."

"I take it things were easier with the woman from Sateda."

"Of course I hadn't been running from the wraith and on my own for years. I am not that man that I was before, and that man would have known what to say or do."

"As I see it, the Doc likes the man you are now, being how she never met the man you were more than what, ten years ago. Which tells me that she likes the man you are now, so you must have done something right."

"Right now she doesn't like any me." Ronon said with a sigh, laying his head down against his pillow, looking at the ceiling.

"We'll figure this out big guy, and I may have an idea about what you could say."Ronon looked at John skeptically.

"Hey I wouldn't give you bad advice, would I?" John said with a smirk.

Ronon rolled his eyes and shook his head. Maybe he would have been better off keeping his mouth shut.

John's idea was for Ronon to tell Jennifer what it was about her that he liked. He said to be honest, which Ronon was, and tell her why he had said what he had the night before. While it wasn't a bad idea it wasn't exactly him though, Ronon wasn't one for long speeches and even less for long speeches about feelings.

John stayed for about thirty minutes or so, Ronon looking through the window whenever Jennifer passed by. Even after his talk with John, Ronon still felt that he had ruined things forever and he would now be left wondering 'what if' for the rest of his life. John's idea wasn't him and he felt if anything it wouldn't sound like him and if he did go through with it, Jennifer was sure to know that he had been told to say those things. In the end that would only make things worse, but what if he changed what John had said only slightly and made the idea more his own. Yes, it could work; he just needed a hand first.

He wasn't exactly surprised that Jennifer avoided his room during the day and while he would have loved to have her come in so he could see her, part of him was glad she stayed away. This way he had time to think about what exactly he was going to do to get Jennifer to see how he felt. So instead he put up with the other nurses and Doctors who came in during the course of the day. He knew he was being rude to them but they were not Jennifer so he hardly cared one way or the other. He also knew that sooner or later Jennifer would run out of people to check on him, and when that happened she would have no choice but to come and see him.

Teyla came by to visit him after Jennifer had already left for the day, and she didn't look too happy.

"Ronon, how could you do that to Jennifer? She is a sweet woman and she likes you and you couldn't even talk to her about it."

"Did you talk to John?" Ronon asked only a bit surprised at her anger.

"No, I just had dinner with Jennifer. Ronon, she is very upset right now."

"She hates me right now, doesn't she?"

"No, not exactly, she is just sad that you rejected her. Which I am surprised to hear; I thought that you liked her." Teyla said with less venom in her voice.

"I do, I was just stupid. Look, I have an idea but I would need your help. Teyla, can you do some things for me tonight?"

--

Jennifer

Jennifer felt slightly better after her talk with Teyla. Her friend had told her that it was probably all some big misunderstanding, that Ronon would never lead her on and that he must have some reason for last night. Jennifer knew way down deep that Teyla was probably right, but she had also knew that Ronon was a very blunt person. He said what was on his mind and he never hesitated to do so. No, instead he was just horrified that someone like her had more or less thrown herself at him, and Jennifer was not the kind of person who would keep trying when the person she was interested in wanted nothing to do with her.

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Jennifer

Jennifer didn't know how she had managed to get a couple of the nurses to actually go and check on Ronon for the last few days. She was happy enough about it not to question why she was able to put off her first meeting with Ronon since her embarrassing confession. Besides, if she questioned whatever spell was cast she was afraid that it would break. Well, it was about to anyway because she was fixing to walk into his room but she was still happy that she had been able to hide from him for so long.

John, Teyla and Rodney had all come in earlier to visit Ronon. This wasn't a surprise. Jennifer had seen one or all of them coming or going during the days when she was at work. She knew that the four of them had been through a lot together and wondered if they told each other everything. She knew that Teyla knew what had gone on between her and Ronon but did the others?

She was certain that Ronon's fellow teammates were there to celebrate Ronon's release from the infirmary. She stood outside his door and took a deep breath. She knew she was going to have to step into that room and see him. Part of her wanted to get one of the nurses who had been willing to check on him to give him directions but they were nowhere to be found. The other part of her was happy to get to see him while he was still in the infirmary. This was her ground and she was the boss here. So here she stood standing outside his door, about to walk in and let him out so he could recover in his quarters. So with yet one more deep breath she opened the door and walked in.

When she walked in to the room, even though she knew the others were there, the only person she saw was him. Her mind was telling her too many things at once. Telling her to run out of room and never look back. Telling her to run to him, throw her arms around him, and never let go. Telling her that she had a job to do and she needed to get it done. It was that part of her that she listened to.

"Well, I guess you know that we are letting you out of here today, but that doesn't mean that you are free to go about doing what you normally do. You need to rest and let yourself heal properly. Which means no sparring or running around the city till you are told you can. Walks around the base will be okay but start off slowly and only for short distances. John, make sure that you and no other marines spar with him or run with him until I say otherwise." She kept her eyes on Ronon the whole time hoping to see something in those beautiful green eyes, but unfortunately, he was completely unreadable.

She wasn't the only one who was staring. She also noticed that he had not taken his eyes off her since she walked into the room. After a while, she felt distracted by it so she stopped looking at him, thinking it would help. It didn't; instead, it was worse because now she couldn't see him watch her but she felt his eyes on her. Still she kept her eyes downcast looking at the chart in her hand. She wondered if John, Rodney, and Teyla weren't in the room if he would actually talk to her. Would he tell her that that she had made a mistake, that he wanted to be with her, or would he tell her that he wanted to pretend the whole thing had never happened.

Ronon said nothing while she was in the room, just stared at her. John and Teyla though, told Jennifer that they would all make sure that he followed her orders.She didn't linger and was out of the room as soon as she had given Ronon his instructions and had assurances that he would do nothing stupid to aggravate his still healing wound. She was paying attention to nothing other than getting out the door and therefore missed the look that passed between Ronon, John, Rodney and Teyla. If she had, she might have been very worried.

Jennifer had to work late that day and was finally working on getting things ready for her to leave when John came in.

"Hey Doc." John said with a smile.

"Col is there anything wrong that I can help you with?" Jennifer said looking over John.

"No, I am fine I was just wondering how long the big guy is going to be on light duty."

"Well, there is that confidentiality thing but it is still going to be a while before he is released for missions."

"Right, well, it looks like you are just leaving and I am holding you up so I will let you get to finishing up. Night." John said with a bright smile and a wave of his hand.

"Good night Col." She replied as she saved the file she had been working on.She left the infirmary not long after John had left. She was almost to her quarters when she saw Teyla headed her way.

"Hello Jennifer. How was your day? You did a good job today for seeing Ronon for the first time since your talk."

"It was okay. I am just trying to take one day at a time. Teyla, you have talked to him, has he said anything?"

"I am sorry, but I don't want to get any more in the middle than I already am. I consider you both friends and just like I am telling you nothing that he says I am not telling him anything that you have said. Besides I am sure things will get better soon." Teyla said as she began to walk away.

"Wait Teyla. I am so sorry; I have been so busy that I completely forgot to ask you. The other night before my disastrous confession to Ronon, I saw something and I have been meaning to ask you about it. I saw John with his arm around your shoulder; is there something going on between the two of you?"

"No. John has been there as a friend during this whole thing with Michael and he was telling me that one of the teams with him was planning on returning to the planet where Ronon had been shot. That is all; he worries that is all."

"Right, John is only showing his worry."

"Yes, as he worries for every one of his team-mates." Teyla said.

"Of course, that is all." Jennifer said teasingly. She was hoping that her kidding with Teyla would make her feel better but still she felt that emptiness inside.

"Good night Jennifer." Teyla said walking away.

Jennifer got to her rooms and tried to turn on her lights but she got nothing. She tried her radio and got static. Great, she thought to herself, just what she needed. That is when she noticed something was off. It took her a minute to find what it was that was different about her room and when she did, she walked towards the new additions to her room. There on the small nightstand by her bed was a vase with fresh cut flowers; an envelope was propped up against a large candle and a box of matches.

She reached out, lit the candle, and picked up the envelope. She pulled the piece of paper from inside and unfolded it. The handwriting wasn't one that she recognized immediately but something about it reminded her of Ronon. The lines on the page were thick like the person who was controlling the pen wrote slowly and carefully so as to make no mistakes. The strokes looked like they were determined and yet there was a softness that was like he had put a great deal of time and effort into whatever he had written.

It was then she actually started to read what he had so carefully written on that sheet paper. Luckily the light from the candle and the two full visible moons made enough light that she didn't strain her eyes. Eyes that had tears falling silently down her cheeks as she read. She never thought that the big strong warrior from Sateda had all of this in him.

TBC

Author's Note: I promise that you will find out what his big plan is/was in the next chapter please don't hurt me for dragging this out so much.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Ronon

During the days he was stuck in the infirmary, Ronon made his plan a reality. John, Teyla and even Rodney would come by with updates everyday about how things were progressing. John was working on a way to keep the hallway between Jennifer's room and his own empty. Teyla talked to Jennifer almost daily, telling Jennifer that she believed that there was more going on than Jennifer realized, and maybe she should give Ronon another chance. Rodney, meanwhile, was working on a computer program that would cause a minor malfunction in Jennifer's lights in her rooms and her radio.Ronon was working on the letter that he was going to write her, and had several sheets of paper so he could re-write it if he needed to. A few of the nurses had caught him lost in thought while trying to find the right words, and would agree to tell them if only they would keep quiet. He told them that he was planning a surprise for Jennifer and he didn't want her to find out. The nurses who were told seemed happy to help him and keep his secret for him. They even agreed to check on him during his days there so that the whole medical team didn't find out.

He spent part of one day thinking about what he would tell her, and the rest of his time actually writing and improving what he wanted to say. He wanted this to be perfect. One of the nurses, Nurse Christina, even offered to take what he had written and read over it to correct any mistakes he had made. When she had finished, she sat there with him and pointed out the things she had changed and words that she had substituted, and explained to him why she had done these things so that he wouldn't get mad at her. He read the letter a number of times with improvements and agreed that it still said exactly what he wanted to tell Jennifer. So he copied the proofed letter in his best handwriting, making sure he never messed up once.

_Jennifer, I need to tell you what I didn't know how to tell you after your confession. During my years as a Runner, I believed and came to accept that one day I would die alone at the hand of some Wraith whom I was unable to get away from. _

_After I was set free from the wraith and I got here, I decided that if I died it would be with fellow fighters against the wraith. I took the time I now had to mourn for my people who had died, as I didn't have the time while on the run. Then, when I meet up with my people, my one-time friends, I see now that I wanted that part of me back that was lost forever._

_I was fooling myself, there is no going back, and I can only go forward. I used to be fine with the thought that I would die alone, but no longer. If I die on a mission tomorrow even with true friends at my side, I would be alone, even more so now than when I was Runner, because I would have let you get away from me. Even I am not that foolish to let you get away if I even have the slightest chance to keep you._

_I could tell how much I love the way your eyes change color. I could tell you how I would love to have the wonderful smell of your hair to be there every morning when I wake up. I could tell you how much I love the feel of your skin so warm and smooth beneath my hand, and how lucky I would be to know that I could reach out and feel you there beside me when I slept. While all of these things are true, the real things that attracted me to you were not the physical but your personality. Your strength when someone needs you, how when there is a medical situation you are always in charge and work till you just can't go on anymore. Your tireless devotion to put others before yourself. Your humility; I have never heard you ask for anyone to acknowledge what you have done, or tell others how hard it was to do._

_It pains me to know that you don't feel that you are good enough. You see your faults and you don't see the woman that I see when I see you. If you had given me just a minute or two more the other night I would have been able to tell you this face to face. On the other hand, though, it would probably not be put so perfectly. It is my punishment and I accept that. For what I have put you through the last few days, I don't get to see your beautiful face, or eyes as you read this. I have suffered as well in this distance that is now between us. I beg of you to end this punishment. I will be waiting for you in my quarters if you would like to talk. That is all I am asking of you, a chance to talk face to face and a chance to start this all over again._

Ronon was worried how she react to letter. Maybe he shouldn't have listened to Nurse Christina who had told him about the changes she had made. No, he told himself, this would work. A woman knows a woman better than he ever could and it was still his words, it was still how he felt. In truth, he would argue with himself until he knew if his plan had worked or not.

Now he was just sitting in his room. He had given up his slow pacing when the pain in his leg made it difficult to walk. He hated this inactivity; without giving his body something to do it let his mind continue with all the doubts and worries he had.He had jumped when Teyla radioed him, telling him that Jennifer was just moments from entering her quarters, just as he had jumped when John radioed in telling him she would be leaving the infirmary shortly. How long till she noticed what had been left for her to find by her bed? Would she leave and go in search of someone to fix her lights and radio before she found his letter? What if she changed her mind about her feelings about him? What if even after reading his letter she didn't want to give him a chance? Had he blown his best chance at being happy since the death of Melina? Would he spend the rest of his life wondering what if?

This was going to drive him crazy. Maybe he should have taken John up on his idea to have someone hiding near her door to see if she left, and what direction she headed in. That way he would know if she was on her way to see him or not. No, if he had done that, he would already have an idea of her reaction before he answered his door, if she came. No, this was better, so that she would be able to see his genuine and first reaction to her at his door. She would see his relief when his door opened and he saw her face on the other side. She would see with her own eyes what he had put himself, put both of them, through needlessly.

He was about to get up and start pacing the floor of his rooms again when he heard the chirp that alerted him to someone standing on the other side of his door and asking for the door to be opened. For a moment he wanted to smile and start celebrating, but he also knew that it might not be her. Standing and making his way to the door, he kept the hope in his heart that the person on the other side of the door was the one person he wanted to see above all others.

TBC

A/N: My beta is Nurse Christina I felt she deserved to be in the story and she is all kinds of happy about it


	16. Chapter 16

Well this isn't a new chapter exactly. When I posted Chapter 12 I said that I had asked some people on GW on if I should do a happy together chapter or go down an angst trip. This is part of the original happy Chapter 12.

Part of it is very similar because I just kind of changed what happened after Jennifer's confession. It was also not completly finished because the thought came to me about the angst.

I am posting this because 1) I had always planed on sharing this chapter and 2) A very dear close friend of mine is going through some marital issues and I am having a hard time writing happiness right now. Hopefully I will be posting a new chapter though to my other story The Darkness soon (for those who are reading it)

One final warning this is totally unbetaed every spelling mistake is mine, all grammar mistakes are mine and you can see what my poor beta must go through when I send her a new chapter or story to read.

Chapter 12 (original)

Ronon

Ronon had told the joke to lighten the mood if nothing else get her to actually look at him and if he was really lucky he might even get a laugh. He never thought that when she looked at him he would see unshed tears reflecting her beautiful brown eyes. Then he saw the anger flash in her eyes just as she began to yell at him.

The last time he had felt this small, this terrible, he had been a Runner and found out that because he stayed the night in an innocent village that village had been destroyed. This though was something different but just as bad. He remembered when he was nine he was out play fighting, sparing, with some friends they were pretending to be great commanders, winning this big battle against the wraith one that would save the galaxy. When he had finally come home, late, his mother was there and he could see she had been crying and she reached out to him and hugged him to her tight, then she pushed on his shoulders and yelled at him for making her worry. He got the same feeling now and just like with his mother, he hated it more than he could say.

When she stopped yelling at him he didn't know what he could say to take away that hurt and fear. He thought about apologizing and opened his mouth to say so, but he knew that it would not be enough to make her feel better, just like with his mother all those years ago. So instead he closed his mouth and waited to see if she had anything else to add that he could comment on. Maybe she would say something that would give him an idea of what to say to make things right with her again.

When she started her speech he wasn't sure where she was going with it, but as she continued to speak he began to see that this was something that she had been wanting to say for some time now.

He didn't know what to say to what she had just reviled to him. He had not taken his eyes from her during her outburst and even through her speech. He watched as her eyes feel to the floor. He was aware that if he did not say something soon she would take his silence to mean his rejection and then she would walk away and then he might lose his chance with her forever, he couldn't let happen.

"I…I don't know what to say." Ronon told her honestly and watched as her eyes fell to the floor and she began to turn as if she was leaving, and he knew he had to continue quickly before she walked out the door and then he didn't know how long he would have to wait.

"That isn't a rejection if that is what you are thinking. I am just saying that I wasn't expecting that. I haven't been in a situation like this in a very long time I need to think."

"You mean you haven't had someone yell at you for making inappropriate joke and then turn it around into a confession of feelings?" Jennifer asked.

"Not quite that exact situation." He told her with a smirk. "I just meant well the last woman that I have even had a conversation in anyway similar to this one died ten years ago."

"Would you rather that I kept my mouth shut?" Jennifer asked her voice had just a hint of anger and sadness. So far this conversation wasn't turning out well.

"I never said that. I have been alone for a long time and years ago I resigned myself to the fact that I would die alone, or in the company of Wraith. Since I have been here, and even more recently I have decided I don't want to die alone. I just don't know how to do this. We are from two different worlds and I don't know how to go about this."

"Well Right about now I would happy with a promise of a date when you get out of here." Jennifer said turning back to face him, with that smile that he liked to see on her.

"Then we will have a night were we will get some junk food and watch that movie…um…Alien." Ronon told her remembering what Rodney had said about scary movies and girls curled up on shoulders.

Her answer was a bright smile and a laugh. "I would like that."

She moved so that she was right up against the bed and placed both her hands on his right forearm, and he in turn shifted and covered her small hands with his much larger left hand.

For a while neither spoke they were happy to just be together and have some idea of where they were going. He marveled in the warm feel of her always gentle touch, and the feeling of her thumb slowly rubbing back and forth over the same patch of skin over and over. As he sat enjoying that wonderful touch he had a sudden question to ask her.

"So how long am I going to be stuck in this place and allowed to leave and get us ready for our date?"

"Oh well um it will of course be a few days at least just to make sure there are no complications, and then you will be released of course you will have to take it easy for a while."

"So I guess then you will have to come over quite frequently to make sure that I don't over do it." Ronon told her with a smirk.


	17. Chapter 17

Well I again want to Thank everyone who has reviewed this story. It has helped me continue to write this story and the others that have come to mind. I also want to thank my beta for reading and helping me make this story readable. I may write an epilog or do another story for this one I haven't decided yet.

Chapter 16

Jennifer

Jennifer sat there on her bed for a few minutes. The letter was the most beautiful thing that anyone had ever written to her before. She had no idea that he felt this way for her.

Could this all be an elaborate joke? God she hoped not, but if it wasn't a joke then it must true. Really, the only way to know for sure was to go and see him.She met no one on her way to Ronon's quarters and wondered if it later than she had realized. Well, it was better this way; now she wouldn't meet anyone wondering what she was up to, and she wouldn't have to explain where she was going and why.

She stopped outside his door, and just stared at it as if it had the answers she was looking for. With a sigh, she reached out and activated the alarm telling the man inside that he had a visitor. She was shaking all over and wanted it to stop as she waited anxiously for the door to open.

It felt like she stood there for an eternity before the doors finally slid open. There before her stood Ronon and the look on his face told her so much. It was a mix of relief, joy and even a little bit apprehension. She would remember that face forever. The man who stood before her was one who was always so in control and was now in a situation that his fighting and guns couldn't fix, and it showed in the worry she read behind those green eyes.

"You wrote the letter? Did you mean what you wrote?" She asked, still not sure that what was happening wasn't a dream.

"I wrote it and every word is the truth." he told her, reaching out to her.

It felt like a lifetime could have passed in the time it took his hand to reach her check. She was aware that in that moment she should have never worried about what he wrote being truth. She saw the truth of his words in his face and heard it when he had spoken.

His hands were rough and calloused against her skin, and yet his touch was feather soft. She craved more of his touch and she turned her head into his palm as she stepped closer to him. Closer to the promise she saw written on his face. One that she felt sure was mirrored on her own face.

The door slid closed behind her, but it seemed to her as if the only thing in the whole world was the man in front of her.

"The letter was beautiful, but why didn't you tell me this sooner? Why wait so long after my confession? You could have gotten the nurses or someone to tell me this to my face."

"I said in the letter I was taken by surprise when you confessed how you felt. If I had know what was coming I would have been able to tell you that I felt the same for you. I must admit though, that I don't think I could have said the same things that I was able to write to you."

She, of course, knew that he had explained things in the letter but she wanted to hear the words, to see for herself that maybe the last few days had been as bad for him as they were for her. Things had been easier for him she thought to herself; he knew that the person he was planning on confessing to felt for him what he felt for her and so it had to be easier for him.

"Ronon." she sighed as she stepped closer and wrapped her arms around his waist.His arms came around her frame and she was completely enveloped. She felt his head resting on the top of her head and felt as he sighed. She closed her eyes and let all of her other senses take over. The way he smelled of leather and a spice that was just him. The feel of his shirt over his muscled back just under her hands. The way that his arms were snug around her making her feel safe. The sound of his heart beating under her ear, a heart that could have stopped because he was trying to help others.

They were just standing there when Jennifer became aware that something was wrong. She could feel him sway slightly and his heart rate change, she also felt him tense.

"Shoot, I forgot about your leg; you need to sit down." she told him while she led him to his bed.

They got him over to his bed and situated so that his back was against the headboard and his legs were out in front of him. Jennifer sat beside him on the edge of the bed.

"I am glad you came over to talk to me. I thought that after what happened that you would never want to talk to me again." he told her.

"I had to come, that letter was very beautiful and compelling. I had to come and talk to the man that wrote such things."

Ronon just smiled and pulled her over and settled her on his lap. She went willingly and relaxed against him settling her head on his shoulder. Neither said anything. For right now, this was enough. They were simply enjoying this new step their relationship had taken and basking in the feeling of being in another's arms.

Ronon

He felt relief and joy when he opened the door and saw Jennifer standing there, but he also felt fear. Fear that maybe she was just there to tell him to stay away from her, but he knew that he would find a way to make her understand if that was her plan.He had been happy when he was with Melina; he loved her so much, and he knew that part of him would always feel like that. He also knew that he could have those same feelings with Jennifer. He also came to realize that those dreams he had thought long dead, could be resurrected.

He didn't know how long they stood there; to be honest he really didn't care. Jennifer felt so right there in his arms, the smell of her hair tickling his nose.The pain in his leg, which had been a mild irritation, was starting to get worse. He didn't want to ruin the moment and so he said nothing and didn't pull away. He should have realized though that because she was a doctor, she would be the person to notice that he was fighting against the pain.

When he pulled her to his lap he wanted, needed, to have her close. To know that all of this was really happening, that this was real. He felt the sigh she let out against his neck and he felt her relax against him. Before too long he felt her relax more and her breaths became deeper and more regular, and knowing she had fallen asleep, he managed to move them both to a more comfortable position. It wasn't too much longer before he too fell asleep.

The next morning he woke before her. He remembered the last time that he held a woman in his arms when he woke up. It had been so many years ago, but it seemed like only yesterday. The feel of a warm, soft body pressed against him was something he had missed. He pulled her against him tighter and relished in the feel of having Jennifer so close to him even with the layers of clothing between them.

She tensed against him for a moment before relaxing against him, and he knew that she was awake.

"Morning." he said quietly, still looking down at her.

"Morning." she replied with a smile. "I didn't mean to fall asleep on you last night."

"I don't mind really, anytime you want to fall asleep on me just come on by."

"Careful, I may just take you up on that offer and then you won't be able to get rid of me." she told him.

Ronon just smiled and brought his head down for a kiss. He wanted to take things slow. It had been so long, and part of him wanted to pull her underneath him and ravish her. Another part said he needed to take things slow to let both of them get used to this new level of their relationship.

The need for air eventually drove them to break apart. She kept her hands on his face and gave him a bright smile on her slightly swollen lips before pulling his head down for yet another kiss. Her lips were soft and warm against his and when he gently licked her bottom lip, they opened eagerly with a slight moan. The longer they kissed the faster his resolve to take things slow fled away.

It was much later that the two left his quarters and headed to hers, so that she could change out of her clothes that she was wearing from yesterday. They then headed hand in hand to the mess hall.

They ended up sitting with John, Teyla, the baby, and Rodney. The two figured that Ronon's teammates would want to know that his plan worked, like they needed to be told. He knew that he had hardly stopped smiling since he woke up and he knew that she was the same.

The friends sat and talked about what had gone on during the days that Ronon was in the infirmary, knowing that other than the fact the Ronon and Jennifer were together they would hear nothing else. Most of the news was pretty normal; nothing overly exciting, but there was one point of interest; Major Lorne and a contingency of Marines went to the planet where they had been ambushed. Unfortunately, when they got there, there was nothing left to find. They found nothing but the burned and destroyed remains of a building. They had searched but found nothing that they could salvage. "

We'll get them sooner or later." John said leaving out what everyone at the table silently filled in. 'What damage would he do though before they found him?'

THE END


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